


play it sweet in heaven

by amosanguis



Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Angst, Bryzzo, Chicago Cubs, Crying, M/M, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Non-Linear Narrative, Social Media, title from a country song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 04:20:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8563819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amosanguis/pseuds/amosanguis
Summary: Chicago Cubs (@Cubs) We are deeply saddened to announce that due to complications, Kris Bryant and Anthony Rizzo have lost their first child.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title from “Cryin’ For Me (Wayman’s Song)” by Toby Keith

-z-

 

“I love you,” Anthony says, pressing a kiss to the inside of Kris’s palm, Kris’s black funerary suit rubbing against his chin.  “We’re going to be okay.”

Kris turns his palm so it presses against Anthony’s cheek.  “I know,” he says.  “I know.”

 

-

 

 **_Chicago Cubs (@Cubs)_ ** _We are deeply saddened to announce that due to complications, Kris Bryant and Anthony Rizzo have lost their first child._

 **_Chicago Cubs (@Cubs)_ ** _Our thoughts and prayers are with them during this difficult time._

 

-x-

 

“Anthony,” Kris starts, anxiously rubbing his hands together.  “Anthony, I think I might be pregnant.”

 

-

 

Kris takes three home pregnancy tests for men before he lets Anthony drag him to the team’s doctors.

“Holy shit,” the doctor says, his cheeks puffing out as he exhales a big sigh.  He looks back up at Kris, says, “You’re definitely pregnant.”

Anthony grins and pulls Kris to him, presses a kiss to his temple.  He whispers, “Whatever you want to do.”

“Before you make any decisions,” the doctor cuts in, “there’s a few things you should know.”

He tells them that while it was possible, very few men were actually able to carry to term – it had nothing do with their own actions necessarily, it’s just that men’s bodies were slower to change and adapt to the pregnancy.  He tells them that it’ll be hardest for Kris in the last trimester, that that’s when most miscarriages occur.

He then tells them that while 98% of men were able to make it through their pregnancies, even if their infants didn’t, at least 2/3 were unable to get pregnant a second time.

Anthony and Kris listen carefully, make mental notes – holding each other’s hands the entire time.

 

-

 

“I fucking hate you,” Kris snaps, glaring at Anthony from over the rim of the toilet bowl.

Anthony holds out a packet of crackers and sheepishly says, “I’m sorry, dude.”

 

-

 

 **_Chicago Cubs (@Cubs)_ ** _In case you guys are wondering, @KrisByrant_23 is doing great! He’s still hanging around the clubhouse and traveling with the team!_

 **_Anthony Rizzo (@ARizzo44)_ ** _@Cubs @KrisBryant_23 <3_

-x-

 

“It’s okay,” Anthony says, pressing his lips tightly against Kris’s temple, his arms wrapped around Kris so, so tight.  Holding Kris through the tremors.  “It’s okay.  I’m here.”

Kris squeezes his eyes closed and screams into Anthony’s chest.

 

-x-

 

 **_Kris Bryant (@KrisBryant_23)_ ** _Finally starting to show. Still doesn’t seem real! #babybump_

 **_Anthony Rizzo (@ARizzo44)_ ** _@KrisBryant_23 u cute_

 

-

 

“Anthony,” Kris snaps, “if you don’t stop fussing over me I’m moving in with my parents.”

Anthony immediately puts his hands in his pockets to stop himself from readjusting the pillow under Kris’s ankles.  Again.  “Do you need—”

“ _No._ ”

 

-

 

“How’s it looking, doc?” Kris asks, listening with awe to his baby’s – _their_ baby’s – heartbeat for the first time.

“Everything looks great, guys,” the doctor answers.  “Your baby’s in perfect health – and so are you, I must add.  Would you like to know the sex?”

Kris and Anthony share a look before Kris smiles and says, “No, not yet.”

 

-x-

 

“Sir, I’m sorry but you can’t stay in here—”

“I can’t—”

“Sir, you need to let us do our jobs and we can’t do that if you’re here.”

 

-

 

There’s blood on Anthony’s hands and he’s on his knees on cold hospital tile and there’s absolutely nothing he can do.

 

-x-

 

“Look, in case it happens and there’s an emergency,” the doctor says as she hands them a card.  “Call 9-1-1, don’t try to drive yourselves, and then call me immediately afterwards.”

“What are our chances looking like right now?” Anthony asks, looking down at the card in his hand.  Kris was still changing in the room behind them.

Dr. Tiffany Ahn smiles, “Both Kris and the baby are looking fantastic – they really are.  But the risks will go up the further along he gets, especially right now as he enters his seventh month.  Remember, you can always elect to have a C-section now and the hospital can care for the baby until they’re ready to go home.”

“We were just talking about that,” Anthony says, nodding.  “When can we set up an appointment to do that?”

“I’ll look it up for you,” Dr. Ahn says.  “I’ll call you and let you know.”

“Thanks, doc,” Anthony says, shaking her hand.  “I really appreciate everything.”

 

-

 

They don’t have time to schedule the appointment.

 

-

 

“Something’s not right,” Kris says, looking down at his food.

“Something wrong with the potatoes?” Anthony asks, because he doesn’t dare to think about what else could be wrong – not with the way Kris has suddenly gone pale, has started to sweat.

Kris looks up, fear in his eyes, and says, “Call 9-1-1.”

 

-x-

 

“Take as much time as you need,” Hoyer says, his voice rough and his eyes red-rimmed.  He clears his throat and adds, “You know where to find us.  Whatever you need, boys.”

“Thanks,” Anthony says, numb, his fingers intertwined with Kris’s.  Kris was in a medically induced coma – standard procedure for a violent surgery – and all Anthony wanted was to see him awake again.  He just wanted to make sure they had only lost one of their family today.

Hoyer is just about to leave when Anthony calls him back.  “Can you do me a favor?” he asks.

“Anything,” Hoyer says.

Anthony hesitates, tries to keep himself from starting to cry again even as his lip trembles and his eyes burn.  “Can you find out if it was a boy or a girl?”  He swallows, can’t quite look at Hoyer.  “We didn’t know.”

“Of course,” Hoyer says as he loses his own struggle against his tears.  Then he leaves the room and Anthony can hear the broken sob.

 

-

 

Their teammates visit – an endless stream of sympathy and compassion and crying and Anthony almost starts to resent them for it.

The doctors let Kris wake up on the second day.

Then Hoyer is back and he asks Kris, “Do you want to know?”  Kris nods, tightens his grip on Anthony’s hands.  “A boy,” he says.  “You were going to have a boy.”

 

-

 

They put _Michael Bryant-Rizzo_ on the headstone and _April 7, 2017_ as the only date.  The Cubs logo engraved on both sides of the little stone.

 _Never given a chance, yet still loved by many_.

 

-

 

“It’s okay,” Anthony says – they’re still in their funeral clothes and they’ve only just stepped through the door, as Kris falls onto the couch, exhausted.  Anthony walks over to him, looks down at him with tears in his eyes.  “We’re okay.”

Kris looks up at Anthony.  “I know,” he says eventually, reaching over the top of the couch and holding his hand, palm up, to Anthony.

Anthony takes his hand, presses a kiss to the open palm.

“Okay,” he says.

 

-x-

 

 **_Anthony Rizzo (@ARizzo44)_ ** _We’re so lucky @KrisBryant_23. I love you, you’re going to be such a great dad!_

 **_Kris Bryant (@KrisBryant_23)_ ** _@ARizzo44 Thanks, babe! I wouldn’t want to go on this journey with anyone else <3_

 

-z-

 

End.

 


End file.
